Who enjoys revealing problems? Who loves to confess sin? Who wants people to know their vulnerabilities?
I want to be transparent, and real to you. I want you to be able to trust me.... to know that I am just like you in some ways. I want to connect.
I want to be transparent, and real to you. I want you to be able to trust me.... to know that I am just like you in some ways. I want to connect.
Hopefully my home isn't more depraved than all other homeschoolers. Bomb Shell! We have sinners in our home. Did that destroy my testimony?
No, it only makes it richer because I have faith in God to work through my husband and I - our love, our prayers, our Biblical teachings, our modeling - to bring our children to repentance.
Deception separates us from God. Remember Adam and Eve....hiding and covering themselves up. We should expect the very original sin to be dripping with deception. Lying never ends good!
My thoughts rush to the Garden of Eden... Satan wanted God's children. He used deception to separate them from God. Satan is at it over and over in our home. He wants the children God has given us to raise up for Him to be separated from us and God. He wants my children to be isolated, to try to hide, to close their ears but mostly to make their heart rocky, hard, and cold. Reacting I want to target my child, but wisdom from God illuminates the spiritual affair. Satan has been at work building a mighty tower, a stronghold, a dungeon for my child to crawl into. And he hopes my child will feel so guilty and shameful, to never believe freedom is a possibility.
My child is guilty, but I need to look at the core - the root cause - the enemy's hand. "Oh, wicked one, father of lies, I bind you in the name of the Father, Son and Holy Spirit... and I call out the evil spirits of deception, lies, resistance, rebellion, falsehood, wickedness, truthlessness, false visions and teachings, pride, insecurity, hate, denial, destruction, meanness, vileness, guileness, oppression, fear, sickness, self-centeredness, laziness, ignorance, lust, lued, gambling, drinking, spending, stealing, robbing, treading, looseness, carelessness, don't-give-a-careness, disregard, unforgiveness, bitterness and trickery - all of these evil spirits to be removed from my family, myself, my home, my children in the name of JESUS and by the Blood of JESUS."
"And let me remind you - Evil One, you were crushed and made powerless by the finished work of Jesus on the cross and His resurrection. You have no power over me, my family and especially my children. I have read the end of the story."
With a twisting of my stomach, I don't think I can post this .... While I needed to think it through and write it, for now, it will remain in the heavenlies between God and myself.
And there it remained for weeks, until now, when I decided to publish this post. Why now?
Because, I am wanting to be real... raw... who I am regardless of the censoring of others. For the very reason that so many put forth what is polished, pretty, and safe to not risk rejection or being judged guilty.
Oh, Father, how I need you and love you!
Oh, Father, being a mom is hard work and so is being a homeschool mother.
Oh, Father, forgive me for my self-reliance, my caviler independence, my do-good-girl-ness. Cause me not to preach with words, but to speak by my modeling choices and positive actions of living the life you desire me to live. I can't hope to rout out sin, if sin reigns in my heart.
Help me to stop looking for the sawdust in others life when the heavy planks are splintered throughout my life weighing me down. Burn me through your purifying love so that all the dead, heavy, rotten wood can be removed in my own soul.
Thank you Father God for hearing my plea. Thank you for loving me enough to answer my prayer. Thank you for being my Father and my God...and thank you for Your Word! I am in awe of You and Your Word that describes You and everything I need.One of the jobs of being a homeschool mom is being sensitive to the Lie Detector. When your child says an assignment is done, you naturally want to believe him or her. I am amazed at the amount of times when the Holy Spirit whispers to me... "you betta check it." I don't want to be "mama-cop" but it is my loving responsibility to check (especially when prompted by God) and make certain my children follow through.
While this is common to all, it is very rarely spoken.
I wanted to talk about it... give it light... make us stop being shameful. Sin loses its grip when it is addressed head on. Living and working with people every single day, you really get to know them. Homeschool families know more about each other than we may wish.
I certainly know this statement is true for what my family knows about me!
The only reason I can lift my head off of the pillow in the morning... and hope for a warm cup of coffee (simple things mean so much to me) is I live under God's forgiveness provided by His grace and mercy. And with the same grace and mercy given to me, I will extend it over and over to my precious child, until speaking lies is bitterly distasteful and speaking truth is freeing.
Hebrews 11:1 - Faith is the substance of things hoped for and the evidence of things not yet seen.
Great blog post Lindy. It is always amazing to me how God points out his unyielding grace to me through my children. As homeschoolers, we have far more contact and input with our children. For that I am grateful. We can address sin at its root.
ReplyDeleteSin is ugly. When I look at my child in sin, I love him yet am repelled by the sin. How much more God! I am ever thankful the sacrifice that Jesus gave us so that we can come into God's presence clean. "In that while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us."
Lindy, this is beautiful! it is a very honest look- you took the mask off! Sin can no longer keep chaos running around in your home if it is exposed, confronted, and dealt with....
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